The squirrel led Sammy into an interrogation room and sat down at the table.

“Why are you doing this?” Sammy asked him. The other squirrel smiled at Sammy from across the table.

“Do you actually know what happened after you caught me in the peanut butter trap? You were recruited by the ‘Super Secret Squirrel Agency,’ Sammy,” the squirrel said with air quotes. Sammy turned his head to the side in confusion.

“What are you talking about?”

“Oh, Sammy, Sammy, Sammy… you don’t know.” The squirrel threw his arms up in the air and said, “Your whole secret agent double life has been a lie.” Sammy shook his head in disbelief.

“And how would that be?”

“Sammy on the night that I was captured, did you see anything that had the letters SSSA on it? Anything at all?” The squirrel leaned over the table so he was face to face with Sammy.

“I don’t remember. Why does that matter? What are you trying to tell me?” He did not know why that mattered. So what if nothing said SSSA on it? If everything had SSSA on it, then the agency would not be secret. Sammy thought to himself before the squirrel started to talk again.

“Sammy, I am going to be brutally honest with you. Are you ready?” Sammy shook his head, but the other squirrel continued anyway. “Good. So, we both saw that wanted poster with my face on it earlier, but would you believe me if I said it was fake? You probably wouldn’t. It is fake, though. It was created by the Directorate to make you believe that you work at the Super Secret Squirrel Agency…”

“What are you talking about?” Sammy shouted. “Are you saying that this entire time I have been working for the Directorate?”

“Yes. Well I was trying to build up to it, and you just ruined it, but yes. Your whole secret agent career is a lie. Just think about it, Sammy. If you were actually part of the SSSA, then you would have needed more training before you joined. It should have been a HUGE red flag when they just said ‘Yeah! You’re in.’ You didn’t suspect anything though; you just rolled with it.”

“Okay, let me get this straight… I actually work for the Directorate. So, if I actually work for the Directorate, and you’re not a wanted criminal… then what is the Super Secret Squirrel Agency?” Sammy could not wrap his head around the idea that he has been working for the Directorate this entire time.

“Well, if you must know… you’re looking at an agent right now.”

“So… the entire time you have been a real agent and everyone thought you were a criminal?”

“No, Sammy. You were the only one made to believe that I was a criminal. Everyone else in the Directorate knew that I was an agent for the SSSA. You were left in the dark this entire time.”

“Why are you telling me all of this? We’re supposed to be enemies.”

“To be honest Sammy, I never considered you to be an enemy. I know I may seem like I’ve been mean to you, but I actually feel bad for you. You had no idea what has been happening for the last however many years. I feel like you deserve answers.” The squirrel unlocked Sammy’s handcuffs and sat back in his chair. “What do you want to know?”

Sammy paused to think. Then, he said, “Is it okay if I write a story on this?”


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